A monologue by Joey Bauer
A monologue on Moses' encounter with the burning bush, rather in the style of Bill Cosby.
Narrator/Moses
Have you ever wondered what Moses must have been thinking when he came up to that burning bush. Think about it for a minute. Here he is with a new family, new son, and a new flock of sheep to tend to. And he goes up to on this mountain and sees a burning bush. It doesn't seem that odd, except that it never burns up. It just keeps burning and burning.
Now Moses must have been like, "Okay, what's the deal with this bush? It's kinda freaking me out here. Maybe I should go over there and see what it is." Now Moses seemed fairly confident that this bush was basically safe. "It's just a bush." But then it started to talk.
"Moses."
"Ohh! Who what when where why."
"Moses."
"Uh present."
I mean what would you say to a burning bush that just started talking to you?
"Do not come any closer. Take off your sandals."
"You want me to take of my shoes? But what if there are stickers?"
"This is holy ground, there are no stickers."
Now Moses was still not sure whether or not he should trust this bush.
"I am the God of your father, The God of Abraham, The God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob."
"Agh!!" What would we do if we just ignored a sign from God? So he threw off his sandals and hid his face.
"What are you doing?"
"Averting my eyes oh Lord."
"Well stop it, I have something to tell you. The people in Egypt are suffering, I have heard their cries and have come down to bring them to the land of milk and honey."
"Hmm Honey."
"Now go Moses."
"Empade eepadee, what?"
"I am sending you to bring my people from Egypt."
"Me? Are you sure you want me?"
"I will be with you, now go."
"Okay, okay. Let me get this straight. I go to Egypt and say that the God of your fathers has sent me to you and then what, and they're just going to go along with this, I think not. See I think that there going to ask what this God's name is, so what is it?"
"I am, Who I am."
"You are who you are? Okay, how does that help me?"
"You will tell them that I am sent you."
"I am sent me, okay, this is never going to work. Umm all right, Mr. I am, so I'm supposed to go to Egypt and say I am has sent me? Right. You've gotta have something better than that."
"You will say to them, the God of your fathers - the God of Abraham - the God of Isaac - and the God of Jacob has sent you. For this is my name. Tell them that I have heard their cries, and I have sent you to bring them to the land of milk and honey."
"Hmm Honey. And what if they don't buy that, huh, then what."
"What is that in your hand."
"What, my hand? oh this. This is my sheep stick. When my sheep are bad, I hit them on the head and say bad sheep. Bad Sheep."
"Throw it on the ground."
"What? Why? You want me to throw my perfectly good sheep stick on the ground. Okay, you're the boss."
So Moses threw the stick to the ground and as most of us know it turned into a snake.
"Aghh. A snake."
"Moses, stop running like a girl and pick it up."
"What, no it's a snake."
"Pick it up Moses."
"You pick it up if you want it so bad."
"Moses!"
"Oh all right." Moses picked up the snake and it turned back into his staff.
"This is so they will believe."
"Stick, snake, stick snake, stick snake. Hee hee hee. Stick snake stick snake."
"Moses stop playing with the miraculous signs. Now put your hand into your pocket."
"There's not going to be a snake in there is there?"
"No, no snakes."
So Moses put his hand in his pocket, and when he pulled it out it was leprous.
"What is this? Agh, Give me back my hand, Give me back my hand!"
"Put it back in your pocket."
Moses does this and it comes out normal.
"Oh another one of those miraculous sign thingies huh?"
"Now go to Egypt and if they doubt my message, show them these signs."
But Moses still doubted the Lord. And he said, "but I..I.. have never been good with words. I stttttutter."
"Who gave man his mouth? Who makes man deaf or mute? Who gives him sight or makes him blind?"
"Ugh, you?"
"It is I, The Lord. Now go, I will help you speak and teach you what to say."
Even then, Moses still doubted the Lord saying, "O Lord please send someone else. Not me Lord, Not me."
How many times in our lives have we said, not me Lord, please send someone else. Not me. Moses went on to do great and extraordinary things: He led his people from Egypt, parted the Red Sea, brought to us the Ten Commandments, but why? Because he said yes. It may have taken awhile, but he finally said yes. That is the only way the Lord can fill our lives and lead us to extraordinary things, if we say yes. When He calls us to His service, will we say yes? When we see our neighbors suffering, will we say yes? When we are asked to accept Jesus into our lives, will we say yes? Will we say yes? Will you say yes?
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Copyright Joey Bauer, all rights reserved.
This script may be performed free of charge, provided no charge is made for
admission. In return, the author would appreciate being told when the script
is used. He may be contacted at jbauer@sckans.edu