By Marc Harrison
The discussion between King Ahab and Jezebel following Elijah's victory on Mount Carmel.
I Kings ch 18-19.
Ahab,
Jezebel, and
Elijah
(Scene: Small interior set for Ahab and Jezebel. Chair, table with brass or some other Biblical looking set piece.)
Ahab: Jez dear, I'm not sure how to tell you this...
Jezebel: How many times have I told you NOT to call me Jez?
Ahab: Sorry Jezebel dear.
Jezebel: Now what is it you are blabbering about?
Ahab: It's about Elijah...
Jezebel: Elijah! You know how I hate hearing about him. I am so tired of hearing Elijah this and Elijah that!
Ahab: I'm afraid you're not going to like...
Jezebel: What else is new? I never like hearing anything about Elijah! (pause) Well, are you going to tell me or just stand there?
Ahab: He talked your prophets into a contest.
Jezebel: Contest? What kind of contest?
Ahab: It was a kind of 'my God's bigger than your god'. He told the people that whichever God won, was the real true God.
Jezebel: And?!
Ahab: They both made altars and then he challenged them to have their...your god, Baal, call down fire from heaven to consume their sacrifice and...
Jezebel: Of all the dumb... men are so stupid! Why do they always have to prove they are bigger or better or... so what happened?
Ahab: Elijah let your prophets go first.
Jezebel: How big of him! And?
Ahab: They did about all one could expect! They danced, they prayer, they even cut themselves!
Jezebel: So what happened?
Ahab: Uh... nothing!
Jezebel: What do you mean nothing?
Ahab: Just that. No matter what they did, nothing happened. No fire fell from heaven or anywhere else.
Jezebel: And what was Elijah doing during all this?
Ahab: He was encouraging them - kind of, well maybe it was more like mocking. You know, stuff like 'where is your god? Is he asleep, maybe he's on vacation, or maybe he's busy doing something else'...
Jezebel: Enough! I get the picture! So what happened next?
Ahab: You mean when it was Elijah's turn?
Jezebel: Of course I mean, "when it was Elijah's turn".
Ahab: First he had people pour water all over his altar, he even made a trench and it too was full of water - everything was soaked. As matter of fact, it was it was so wet I would have bet nothing would have burnt.
Jezebel: So did it?
Ahab: It did! It was amazing! Elijah called down fire from heaven in the name of his God and it fell! It consumed everything so fast that...
Jezebel: Ok, so Elijah won the peacock contest. So what? As long as I'm queen here, my prophets will always come first.
Ahab: That's the part you're not going to like.
Jezebel: What?
Ahab: The people were so impressed with what Elijah's God did and what your god didn't do, they killed all your prophets...
Jezebel: They did what?! All 450 of them?
Ahab: Every last one!
Jezebel: Call my guards! I want Elijah killed! Send him a message and tell him I swear that by tomorrow he will be as dead as my prophets!
Ahab: But his God seems to be...
Jezebel: I don't care about that! I want him dead!
Ahab: Yes dear.
Elijah: You know that was pretty big day for me - that is until I heard Jezebel was after my head. I have to admit, I high tailed into the wilderness. Hey, I was depressed! I had put it all on the line for God. And all alone! At least I thought I was the only one who stood for God - that is, until He came looking for me and asked why I was hiding. I told him right then and there that I thought the whole thing was unfair. He explained that He had 7000 left in Israel who still honored Him. Then he gave a list of kings and prophets to anoint. As always, God knew best. He knew I was feeling sorry for myself. After all, He had just allowed me to be a part of a great miracle and at the first sign of trouble I get scared and bail out.
I went back to see Jezebel and Ahab. I told them what God had in store for them. Kind of a dog eat... well you know what happened. To make a long story short, it was Ahab and Jezebel who had something to be depressed about - but their gods must have been on vacation or busy or asleep or something...
© Marc Harrison
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He may be contacted at: marcha@radiks.net