Teri: Don't say it! I know exactly how you feel.
Lynn: (dreamily) What I would give right now for a big Mac. . .
John: Or a pizza with pepperoni and buffalo wings. . .
Teri: Well, you might as well stop dreaming. There's no chance of us getting anything like that until we get back!
Chris: What are we going to do? I can't stand it anymore! Here it is, Christmas eve, and I'm stuck on this rusty bucket!
John: And practically no kids!
Teri: And a bunch of grumpy old silver heads!
John: I don't think I've ever seen so many pairs of plaid bermuda shorts in my life.
Lynn: Or white loafers. Uuch! Just the thought of it makes me cringe! Let's face it. . . we've been doomed to the Christmas Cruise!
CHOIR SINGS: The "Christmas Cruise"
Chris: I wonder what our friends are doing right now. . .I can't believe where I am on this Christmas eveI'm so depressed cause I know that I can not leave
I'll tell you where I want to go
To a place where there's lots of snow
Where people are singing
And church bells are ringing
And everywhere you hear this song
Joy to the World the Lord has come
Let earth receive her king
But I'm out of luck
For I'm just plain stuck
On the King George Christmas Cruise
I'm on the Christmas cruise
I've got the Christmas blues
I've got a yearning for a Christmas scene
and a decorated evergreen
I'm on the Christmas cruise
Oh what a Christmas snooze
Please get me out of here
I don't want to be near
Another Christmas cruise
I wonder if there's a way to get off this boat
I wonder if I should jump would I sink or float
I would swim to the nearest shore
I would row with just one oar
to sing merrily
away from this sea
a song to the little child
Joy to the world the savior reigns
Let men their songs employ
But hard as I try
Unless I could fly
I will never leave this boat
I'm on the Christmas cruise
I've got the Christmas blues
I've got a yearning for a Christmas scene
and a decorated evergreen
I'm on the Christmas cruise
Oh what a Christmas snooze
Please get me out of here
I don't want to be near
Another Christmas cruise
John: I bet they're having a blast. Man, it really frosts me that we can't be with them tonight.
Teri: Oh, grow up. You know our parents thought this would be a great way to spend Christmas.
Lynn: Yea, well it's not. I kept telling them I wouldn't mind being "Home Alone". But they saw the movie.
John: Yea, well I'd even rather be in CHURCH at home than at this dumb King George's Plum Pudding festival.
Chris: You make it sound like church on Christmas eve is the second place you most want to avoid.
John: That's right! Why go to church? It just interrupts my whole party schedule! I mean, what does church have to do with Christmas anyway? If I want to hear "Jingle Bells", I just chill out with my compact CD player. Why go to church? They just want you to give up all the money you get in your stocking!
Lynn: I can't believe you've got this attitude about church on Christmas eve. Obviously, there's alot you need to learn about the real meaning of Christmas!
CHOIR SINGS: "There's So Much You Need to Learn About Christmas"
There’s So Much You Need to Learn About Christmas
(Following "There's A lot You Need to Learn About Christmas" the foursome are staring up at the stars in the sky, day-dreaming. A couple, obviously in love, walk by, stop at the rail and look out at the stars. The man points out a star to his lady while the four look on. Chris then breaks the silence.)There’s so much you need to learn about ChristmasThere’s so much you need to know about this day in history
For example
Did you know
That while shepherds watched their flocks at night
They were seated on the ground
And they were looking all around
When angels from the realms of glory suddenly appeared that night
and they were singing
and they were singing
and they were singing out this song
Gloria in exclesis Deo
Gloria in exclesis Deo
Well there’s more you need to know about Christmas
There is much more to the story of the little savior’s birth
For example
Did you know
That in the town of Bethlehem the angel of God did say
There shall the child lie in a stall
This child who shall redeem us all
But there’s more to story
There’s more to this tale
Then entered in those wise men three
full reverently upon their knee
And brought Him incense gold and myrrh
While shepherds their watch were keeping
Well that's what you need to know about Christmas
It is what you ought to know about the birth of God's own Son
So let's sing and celebrate the coming of the holy one
Of the Holy one
Chris: There is one nice thing about being out here in the middle of nowhere.
Lynn: Yea? What's that?
Chris: The stars. It's amazing how many stars are up there. I've never seen anything like it at home.
John: (still grumbling) Who needs stars? There's a zillion lights on the town Christmas tree. That's good enough for me!
Teri: You know, John, if you don't stop complaining we're going to beam you up to the star ship Enterprise and send you in search of the star of Bethlehem!
Chris: You think it's still up there?
Lynn: Is WHAT still up there?
Chris: You know, the star of Bethlehem. I wonder if its out there right now, and we're looking at it just like those wise men did when Jesus was born.
Teri: Wouldn't it be great if that star was shining tonight brighter than any other star in the sky, and we were the ones to discover it?
Chris: We'd be famous!
John: Oh, I'm sure "Sixty Minutes" would be camping out on your doorstep, just waiting to interview the great rocket scientists here who spotted the Bethlehem star.
Teri: All right, John, keep a lid on it. I still wonder. . . does that star still shine?
Solo by Teri: "Does that Star still Shine?"
Lynn: I don't know about the rest of you, but I still think we can have a great party tonight, with just the four of us!"Does that Star still Shine?"Does that star still shine
Does it cast its light
Down on the same earth
as it did that night
When it guided those who sought the king
Who brought a special offering
of frankincense and gold
to the little one king just a few days old
Does that star still shine
Can I trace its beams
To a stable where
the baby Jesus dreams
Did it make the place where Jesus lay
glow with light so far away
that everyone could see
that the the son of God was born for you and me
Shine so bright
Does it shine so bright
Shine star shine
Does that star still shine
Can I see its glow
Does it have a name
Will I ever know
Has it watched the earth since that first night
Has it ever shone so clear and bright
as it led the wiseman three
Does it shine tonight for you and me
Shine so bright
Does it shine so bright
Shine star shine
Shine star shine
Chris: You're right! We've got lots to celebrate! We should have a party! After all, Jesus came not just for a few people, but for all of us. Just because we're out here in the middle of nowhere doesn't mean that Jesus didn't come, or that the angels didn't sing.
Teri: I'm with you guys! What about it, John, are you up for a PARTY!
John: (not real enthusiastic) I suppose. . .
Chris: Great! Let's see. . . I'll go get some cake and ice cream; John, you get the soda and chips. Girls, you decorate. Come on John, let's go. Ladies, we will be back in a flash!
Chris and John exit.
Teri: All right, I'm psyched! Let's get this celebration underway!
(At the end of the song everyone collapses into a lounge chair. John falls asleep with a party noisemaker still in his mouth. Everyone is just getting "mellow" when Teri's parents appear on deck. )Song: "There's No Reason Not to Celebrate"Just because we're stuck out here in the middle of the sea
Doesn't mean we can't celebrate with a birthday party
Just because we're going nowhere fast
Doesn't mean that we won't have a blast
There's no reason not to celebrate the birthday of Jesus
Let's celebrate
(clap)
Let's celebrate
(clap)
Let's celebrate
(clap)
Let's celebrate
For there's no better reason to celebrate than this
that the son of the Father had left heaven's bliss
to come to this earth with this purpose in mind
that those who would trust him new life they would find
Just because we've seen no land in the past three days
Doesn't mean we won't have fun in a million ways
Even though there is no Christmas tree
On this one point we do agree
There's no reason not to celebrate the birthday of Jesus
Mom: There you are! (speaking to Teri) We've been looking all over for you! Dad and I were feeling a little bad that we've made you spend Christmas eve on this boat. Has it been too boring for you tonight?
Teri: Well, it hasn't exactly been. . . (at this point John, while sleeping, breaths deeply and makes the noisemaker sound out)
Mom: What was that!
Teri: I. . . uh. . . um. . . uh. . . it's just the sea breeze tonight. It's been a little strange.
Dad: I'd say!
Mom: When are coming down to the cabin? We're going to send a ship-to-shore message to Aunt Patti and Uncle Tom.
Chris: You can do that?
Dad: Sure. Why? Is there someone you'd like to send a message to?
Chris: It would be great to send a message to Rick and Lisa.
Lynn: And what about Michelle and Randy?
Teri: We'll stay up here and work on our messages, then meet you downstairs in a little while.
Chris: In the meantime we'll see if we can rouse sleeping beauty over there. (motioning towards John)
Teri: OK, let's see, how should we start it out?
Choir sings "Keep Christmas
With Us In Your Heart"
Lynn: I think these messages will do just fine.Dear Friends though we're far apartWill you keep Christmas with us in your heart
Even though we are not with you to celebrate today
We'll always be together if you can find the way
To keep Christmas with us in your heart
To keep Christmas with us in your heart
We've discovered while we're out here on the sea
That no matter where we are to us Christmas will be
A time to laugh have some fun
A time to praise the infant son
What we have learned
Is to keep Christmas in our hearts
We've decided from now on to always live
For the God who gave so much as he did give
And we are all in one accord
To praise the everlasting Lord
By keeping Christmas in our hearts
Keeping Christmas in our hearts
Dear Friends we wish you Christmas cheer
Yours so sincerely your friends far and near
Chris: I just hope they get them before Christmas day is over!
Teri: Are you guys ready to go to the cabins now?
John: Not just yet. . .
Chris: What's up?
Lynn: Yea, I thought you were ready to close the books on this Christmas!
Teri: Lighten up, guys. Come on, John, what's up?
John: I just wanted to thank you guys for making this a great Christmas eve. At first I thought this was going to be a real disaster, but you've all been really patient with me tonight. I needed to be reminded about the real meaning Christmas, and being out here has really helped me to see that I was being selfish. Christmas is about remembering what God has done for us by celebrating together with our friends. I thought this was going to be the worst Christmas ever, but it's turned out to be the best Christmas I've ever known.
Teri: I gotta agree. . .
Chris: Me too. . .
Lynn: Absolutely the GREATEST CHRISTMAS EVER!
What a Great Christmas Its Turned out to Be!
(At the end of the song, everyone begins to leave. While walking out the following discussion takes place:)What a great Christmas its turned out to beEven though we're out in the middle of the sea
It's been a great holiday
It's a wonderful way
To celebrate, celebrate, celebrate Christmas
So ring the bells
beat the drum
Chant a merry ho, ho, ho, ho, dum-de-dum-de-dum
Light a candle put the wreath on the sill
Then settle back and watch as the world grows still
Silent Night
Holy Night
All is calm all is bright
It's a great Christmas a great Christmas
What a great Christmas it's turned out to be
So bake the cake
put the punch in the bowl
for Christmas is the best thing for your body mind and soul
put the tinsel and the lights on the tree
now settle back and listen to this melody
Yea Lord we greet thee born this happy morning
O Come let us adore him Christ the Lord
it's a great Christmas, a great Christmas
What a great Christmas it's turned out to be
Lynn: So what do you think, guys, should we do this again next year?
Chris: No thanks!
Teri: I'll pass. . .
John: I thought I heard mom and dad talking about a boat ride down the Amazon for next Christmas. . .
Lynn: You mean like in the jungle, with alligators and snakes?
Chris: Oh great. . . just when you think it's all over. . .
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© Copyright Raymond J Lombardi. All rights reserved.
A Royalty is payable for use of this script. Sheet music and backing tracks are available from the Author. To pay Royalties and obtain copies of the music, visit the Author's Website at http://www.lorray.com for details.