By Dougie Paton
A family out Christmas shopping discovers there are parallels between the Christmas story and today's world.
Sally & Jack (brother and sister)
Mum
Dad
Mary
Joseph
Abigail (innkeeper's wife)
Rachel (2nd innkeeper)
Jack: How much longer are we going to be? We’ve been in town all day. It’s cold and wet and we never go into any decent shops.
Sally: You mean we never go into any computer game shops. Stop moaning. It is Christmas you know. It’s good to exchange presents.
Jack: Why? You should see some of the things people gave me last year – hankies with my initials on them, and socks in horrible colours.
Sally: You shouldn’t be so ungrateful. Lots of people in the world - and even some here in Glasgow - don’t get anything.
Jack: I’ve got a drawer full of hankies they can have, if they like. Anyway mum, what am I getting?
Mum: Stop fighting, you two, I’m not enjoying this any more than you are. There’s not that much shopping left to do.
Dad: Good, I’ve got that rehearsal at 6.00 for the watchnight service. (sings loudly) “Hark the herald angels sing, glory to the new born King”.
Jack: That’s another thing, why do we have to go to church so much at this time of year? It’s bad enough going every Sunday. And what’s the point of Christmas, apart from presents of course? Tell me that Sally, if you’re so smart.
Sally: You see that guy over there selling the Big Issue? He’s probably got nowhere to sleep tonight. That’s where the Christmas story starts.
Jack: So he’s homeless? So what? What’s that got to do with Christmas?
Mary: Joseph, I’m exhausted. It’s been a long journey and I’m sure the baby’s coming soon. Are you sure there’s no vacancies anywhere? Where are we going to sleep tonight?
Joseph: We’ve already tried a dozen or more places. Why you can’t register for the poll tax at your own home town, I’ll never know. Look here’s a door we haven’t been to yet.
Abigail: Can I help you?
Mary: We’re looking for a bed for the night. We’re desperate. Have you got anything, anything at all?
Abigail: I’m sorry dear, I’ve got ‘em sleeping in the restaurant, it’s so busy. You could try Rachel Jacobson’s place. It’s up the back lane over there – not much passing trade. She just might be able to squeeze you in. You expecting a happy event dear?
Mary: Yes, our son will be born soon – that’s why we’re desperate to find a place to sleep.
Abigail: Your son? I wouldn’t get your hopes up - it could just as easily be a girl after all.
Joseph: Er … anyway, thanks for your trouble. We’ll try your friend. Goodbye. Come on Mary.
Mum: I can’t believe I’ve reached the end of the list – Uncle Frank. I say uncle..., but he’s not a real uncle, of course.
Jack: Who is this Uncle Frank anyway? Isn’t he that hippy guy we saw at your anniversary party last year Mum?
Mum: He’s not a hippy – he just likes things from India. Reminds him of his young days in the sixties.
Jack: And now he’s nearly in his sixties! What are we getting him?
Dad: Here’s a CD of Indian music. Or how about some of these incense sticks?
Sally: That’s really funny.
Mum: What do you mean, dear?
Sally: Don’t you get it, Jack?
Jack: Mum, I think all this shopping’s made her go mad. Get what?
Sally: Our last gift – Frank’s incense. That’s why we give presents. Because they did.
Jack: (exasperated) Who!
Sally: The wise men of course. They brought presents to Jesus– gold, frank - incense and myrrh.That’s why we give presents. And I suppose we’re remembering that Jesus is God’s present to us.
Jack: That makes some sense, I suppose. But it was a very long time ago. It’s hard to imagine what it must have been like.
Joseph: Excuse me, are you Rachel?
Rachel: Yes, that’s me – what can I do for you? You look worn out.
Joseph: We’re desperate for some shelter. Your friend across the road said you might have something.
Mary: We were hoping you could help us. You see, my baby’s about to be born.
Rachel: Well, in the circumstances, I might have something. (thinks for a second) No, it's too smelly and dirty.
Mary: What is it? We’ll take anything.
Rachel: It’s just the shed where I keep the animals. It’s not great but you can’t have the baby on the street.
Joseph: Certainly not this baby.
Rachel: Eh? It’s just through this passage way ...... here. I’ll leave you to it. If you need help, just give me a shout. Goodnight.
Joseph: It’s not very nice dear, is it?
Mary: It’ll be perfect.
Joseph: Perfect? For an ordinary child perhaps, but not for this chosen child. There should be trumpets and queues of royalty paying homage.
Mary: We don’t have any choice. Anyway, maybe God has provided this place for his own reasons. Maybe this place will be important for our grandchildren and their grandchildren.
Joseph: This dump?
Mary: I don’t mean as a place. I mean it might be important for them to know that the chosen one was born in an ordinary place around ordinary people. Not in a palace. I’ve a feeling his whole life will be spent in helping ordinary people. It’s good that he should start out this way.
Joseph: Anyway, you try to get some rest - I’ve a feeling you’ll need it.
Sally: Jack, mum says have you finished hanging up your stocking - or should I say 2 metre bin bag?
Jack: Tell her I’m just coming. I’m just checking out something in my bible.
Sally: Your bible! When did you last open that?
Jack: Never mind that. I just thought I’d check out some things the minister said at that service tonight. They’ve made me think?
Sally: How do you mean?
Jack: I always used to think Jesus was just a baby in a stable 2000 years ago and not much to do with me.
Sally: And have you changed your mind?
Jack: Yes, I’ve got a feeling Jesus is forever and not just for Christmas Eve.
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Copyright Dougie Paton, all rights reserved.
This script may be performed free of charge provided no entrance fee is charged.
In return the author would like to be told of any performance. He may be contacted
at dougie@patonfamily.com