The Case of The Missing Body
Chief Priests & Elders, Plaintiff
vs
The Apostles, Defendant
By John Porter
Summary
A trial which examines the evidence for the resurrection of Jesus.
Participants in Trial:
Judge Johnson
Bailiff/Court Reporter
Plaintiff – Chief Priests & Elders
Plaintiff's Lawyer
Defendant – The Apostles
Defendant's Lawyer
Witness 1 – Mr. Mammon Moves-Me
Witness 2 – Doc. Holiday
Witness 3 – Joseph of Arimathea
Witness 4 – Detective Harry Reasoner
Witness 5 – Peter
Witness 6 – Mary Magdalene
Jury – Congregation, with one designated as the Jury Leader.
Script
BAILIFF: This honorable court of the Nineteenth Judicial Circuit with the
Honorable Judge Johnson is now in session. All rise. (wait for Luke
to be seated) You may be seated.
JUDGE: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this case involves the disappearance
of the body of Jesus Christ from the tomb of Joseph of Arimathaea. In this
case, The Chief Priests and the elders at Jerusalem will be the plaintiff.
The defendants in this case are the following: Peter, Andrew, James
the son of Zebedee, John, Philip, Bartholomew, Thomas, Mathew, James the
son of Alphaeus, Thaddeus and Simon. The Chief Priests and the Elders are
asking you to decide whether or not these eleven men stole the body of
Jesus Christ from said tomb, leaving only a few linen clothes behind. The
lawyer for the Chief Priests and Elders, do you wish to make an opening
statement?
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: The evidence in this case will prove that during
the night between the 13th & the 14th of Nisan, these eleven Apostles
of Jesus Christ stole the body of their leader from the tomb of one Joseph
of Arimathea. When Mary Magdalene came to the tomb early in
the morning on the 14th, the stone covering the mouth of the tomb had been
rolled away and the body of Jesus Christ was missing. The only thing left
in the tomb were a few linen clothes and some myrrh and aloes that were
used for embalming . The court will find beyond any doubt that the
only possible, reasonable explanation for such an incident as this, is
that the body was stolen, and the conspirators are with us in this courtroom
today.
JUDGE: The lawyer for the eleven apostles, do you wish to make an opening
statement?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Yes. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my
clients, That I will herein refer to as “The Apostles”, have been wrongly
accused of stealing the body of Jesus Christ from the tomb of Josepth of
Arimathea. These said Apostles are followers of the aforementioned Jesus
Christ but are in no way guilty of the accusations brought before you this
day by said Plaintiffs. I will show without a shadow of a doubt that
my clients are innocent of this ridiculous accusation. That the body
of Jesus Christ was not stolen as they claim. It will be clear by
the end of this trial that Jesus Christ, as he said he would, rose from
the dead on his own accord with no help whatsoever by these eleven gentlemen.
JUDGE: Plaintiff's lawyer, please call your first witness.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: I call for my first witness a Mr. “Mammon Moves-Me”
to the witness stand.
BAILIFF: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly swear
that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole truth
and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
MR. MAMMON: Yes
BAILIFF: You may be seated.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Please state your name.
MR. MAMMON: Mammon Moves-Me.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Where do you live?
MR. MAMMON: I live in the town of Mammon, located just north of the
Sea of Galilee.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Is it true that Jesus said while he was still alive
on this earth: “I am able to destroy the temple of God, and
to build it in three days.?”
MR. MAMMON: Yes, that is correct. I heard it with my own ears.
That’s exactly what he said.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Wouldn’t it be safe to say that this man is a very
dangerous individual? I mean talking about destroying God’s temple and
all? And wouldn’t it be safe to say that any followers of this man
could be considered dangerous? Or at the least thieves and robbers?
DEFENDANTS LAWYER: I object your honor! Counsel is leading the
witness.
JUDGE: Sustained. The last question will be scratched from the
record.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: No further questions your honor.
JUDGE: Defense counsel. Do you want to cross-examine Mr. Mammon?
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: Mr. Mammon, you quoted Jesus as saying, and I quote:
“I am able to destroy the temple of God, and to build it in three days”,
is that correct?
MR. MAMMON: Yes, That's correct.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: But, isn’t it true that what Jesus really said
is, and I quote: “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise
it up.”
MR. MAMMON: Yeah, that’s what I said.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: No, it is not Mr. Mammon. I call your attention
to the first word of your so-called quote. The word “I”. Jesus
did not say “I am able to destroy the temple of God” but what he said is
simply “Destroy the temple of God”. You are implying by your quote
that Jesus said that he was going to destroy the temple of God which in
fact he did not say or mean at all! But, rather, that someone else; of
which you are a part, will destroy the temple of God. Jesus, referring
to himself, did not destroy himself. But, you and your corrupt friends
are really the ones that destroyed the temple of God when you nailed him
to a tree! Therefore Mr. Mammon, you and yours are guilty of destroying
the temple of God!
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: I object your honor! The defense is badgering
the witness!
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: No further questions, your honor.
MR. MAMMON: (walks off stage and talks to defense lawyer) I never
thought of it that way, we’re guilty of the blood of Jesus.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: (hands him money and a tissue) Here take this!
And get out of here!
JUDGE: Plaintiff's counsel, you may call your next witness.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: I call Doc Holiday to the stand.
COURT REPORTER: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly
swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole
truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
DOC. HOLIDAY: I do.
BAILIFF: You may be seated.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: State your name.
DOC. HOLIDAY: Edwin Thurmond Holiday, MD, PHD, DDS,
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: What is your occupation?
DOC HOLIDAY: I am a Physician at The Jerusalem School of Medicine.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Are you acquainted with one Jesus of Nazareth?
DOC. HOLIDAY: Yes.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Do you think he was in good physical condition?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Objection! The question is not relevant to the
case.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: I’m leading up to my point you honor.
JUDGE: Objection overruled. Get to the point counsel.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Do you think Jesus of Nazareth was in good physical
condition?
DOC. HOLIDAY: Yes, I’m certain that he was in top physical condition.
He never once was in the hospital for any kind of medical care. As
a matter of fact he was in such great physical condition that a woman that
I had been treating for years went to him and was healed immediately just
by touching him. I desired to look into this in greater detail but
I just never had the time.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: So don’t you think it’s possible that a man in
such great physical shape could have possibly withstood many a wound to
his body? And isn’t it possible that when they took Jesus off from
the cross that he was merely in a state of shock, a sort of “mini-coma”
if you will? And in the process of taking Jesus off from the cross,
the aroma of the spices and the coolness of the tomb, that he revived?
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: I object your honor. This is all conjecture!
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: This is a very important point that I am leading
up to your honor.
JUDGE: Objection overruled. Answer the question Mr. Holiday.
DOC. HOLIDAY: Yes I suppose that could happen.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: I have no further questions, your honor.
JUDGE: Do you wish to cross-examine, defense counsel?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Yes. Mr. Holiday, I would like to clarify.
You are a physician are you not?
DOC. HOLIDAY: Yes.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: How many people have you seen “come-to” after being
crucified?
DOC. HOLIDAY: I have never seen anyone survive crucifixion. The
Romans are expert executioners.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: It’s an established fact that the Roman soldiers
did not break the legs of Jesus Christ. The Jews asked Pilate to
have their legs broken, so that the bodies would not remain upon the cross
on the sabbath day. Could you answer as to why they did not break
the legs of Jesus when ordered to do so?
DOC. HOLIDAY: They didn’t break his legs because he was already dead.
DEFENDANTS LAWYER: The Roman soldiers thrust a spear into the side
of Jesus and something came out, did it not Mr. Holiday?
DOC. HOLIDAY: Yes. Blood and water came out.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: From your vast knowledge in the medical profession
Mr. Holiday what would that indicate to you concerning Jesus’ medical condition
at that moment?
DOC. HOLIDAY: That is an indication that his heart had exploded.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: So if the Plaintiff’s counsel is correct then Jesus
survived the following:
Severe beating, Loss of blood, Crucifixion, Further loss of blood,
A spear thrust into his side producing a gaping wound of which blood and
water flowed out indicating his heart had exploded, survived entombment
with 100 pounds of spices on his already weakened body, survived three
days without food and water, woke up without any medical assistance having
lost most of his blood, was able to move a huge stone that a healthy man
would have a hard time moving. Once outside he overpowered a group
of Roman soldiers that are expert killing machines, then walked 7 miles
to Emmaus on feet that had been pierced with nails.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: I object your honor.
DEFENDANTS LAWYER: I have no further questions your honor.
JUDGE: You may be excused, Mr. Holiday. (pause)
Next witness.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: I call Joseph of Arimathea to the stand.
COURT REPORTER: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly
swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole
truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
JOSEPH: I do.
BAILIFF: You may be seated.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: State your name.
JOSEPH: Joseph of Arimathea.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Did you not request the body of Jesus Christ from
Pontius Pilate?
JOSEPH: Yes, I did.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: And did you not place the body in your own new
tomb of which you had hewn out?
JOSEPH: Yes, that is correct.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: And did you not wrap the body in linen cloth, and
did you not roll the stone over the mouth of the tomb yourself?
JOSEPH: Yes, that is true!
PLAINTIFF’S
LAWYER: So you had complete control over the body of Jesus Christ.
You and you alone had complete control over the tomb. You had complete
control of wrapping the body. Is it not true that you conspired with
the disciples once you could see that Jesus was not dead and determined
to make yourself richer than you already are by staging the resurrection
of Jesus! And, hidden in the wrappings were instruments to allow Jesus
to escape with the help of these 11 accomplises? And is it not true Mr.
Joseph of Arimathea…
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: I object to these perposterous ramblings!
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: Perposterous or true? Are you afraid of the
truth coming out counsellor?
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: Wisdom is justified of her children counselor!
JUDGE: Order! Order in the court!
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: No further questions.
JUDGE: Defense counsel, would you like to cross-examine the witness?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Yes, your honor. Joseph, as you were transporting
and wrapping and preparing the body of Jesus did you notice anything unusual?
JOSEPH: No I did not.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: I have no further questions.
JUDGE: You may be excused. (pause) Any
more witnesses?
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Just one. I call Detective Harry Reasoner to the
stand.
COURT REPORTER: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly
swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole
truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
HARRY: I do.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: State your full name.
HARRY: Harry Worldly Reasoner.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Harry, where do you work?
HARRY: I work at JBI. The Jerusalem Bureau of Investigation.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: You have been working on this case have you not?
HARRY: Yes, I have.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Harry, from your professional point of view what
conclusion have you come to concerning this case; Case # 5747, “The
Case of the Missing Body.”
HARRY: Well, we looked at this case from every possible angle.
First, we looked at the possibility that Jesus Christ was never put
in the tomb in the first place but was thrown into a pile with all the
other criminals. But, this was found to be false because we could not locate
the body.
Secondly, we looked at the possibility that everyone who saw Jesus
after his death was in delusion. But we threw this out on the grounds
that none of the followers of Jesus expected him to resurrect in the first
place. So why would they be in delusion and think they saw him?
Thirdly, we looked at the possibility of mistaken identity. Someone
trying to impersonate Jesus and gaining attention to themselves.
Possibly a disciple dressed up to look like Jesus. We had to throw
that out too though because as I said earlier we could not locate the body
and his disciples didn’t expect him to come back to life in the first place.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: So you were very thorough in your investigation
Mr. Reasoner?
JUDGE: Please get to your conclusion Mr. Reasoner.
HARRY: Yes, we were very thorough in our investigation, and we concluded
that the disciples of Jesus Christ came and stole the body at night while
the guard was asleep.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: I have no further questions.
JUDGE: Do you want to cross-examine this witness, defense counsel?
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: Yes. Mr. Reasoner could you tell the court
what you found in the tomb? Was there anything at all in there?
HARRY: There was some linen clothes, and the napkin, that was about
his head, not lying with the linen clothes, but wrapped together in a place
by itself.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: You say wrapped together. Were these clothes
scattered around the tomb or were they laid neatly and in order.
HARRY: They were neat and in order.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: In your experience as a law enforcement officer
when someone breaks in and steals something, even though they are in a
hurry, don’t they usually take the time to stop and tidy up the place before
they leave?
HARRY: No way, are you kidding? They trash the place.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Mr. Reasoner, you say that the only conclusion
that you came up with is the one where Jesus’ disciples stole the body.
Could you explain to me how a group of eleven citizens could sneak past
an experienced, trained group of hardened Roman soldiers?
HARRY: Well, when we interviewed the Roman soldiers that is what they
told us, and it seemed like the only plausible answer. Those soldiers
were there, eyewitnesses at the scene of the crime.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Could you tell the court what the penalty is for
a Roman soldier that fails at his post?
HARRY HART: The penalty is death.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Were these Roman soldiers put to death or for that
matter reprimanded in any way?
HARRY: Now that I think of it, No. They were not reprimanded
in any way. As a matter of fact my wife works at the Jerusalem EZ-mart
and she was saying that this particular group of Roman soldiers came in
there on a shopping spree the day after this incident. That seemed
strange to me knowing how little they get paid.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: Hmmm. Oh, wait a minute maybe my clients
bribed the soldiers. You know gave them big bucks to look the other
way.
HARRY: No way! We ran a credit report on all eleven of these
guys. There stone broke, every one of them. Silver and Gold?
They don’t have an ounce to their name.
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: What exactly did the Roman soldiers say to you
detective? They were there. If anyone knew what happened, they
would.
HARRY: Well they said “His disciples came by night, and stole him away
while we slept.”
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: But how could they know what happened while they
were asleep? Could they see the disciples steal the body while they were
sleeping? Of course not. If they were asleep, they wouldn't know what happened.
No further questions your honor.
JUDGE: Thank you, you are dismissed. Are there any more witnesses?
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Plaintiff rests his case.
JUDGE: Defense counsel, you may present your case to the jury.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: I call Simon Peter to the stand.
COURT REPORTER: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly
swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole
truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
PETER: I do.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: State your name.
PETER: Peter.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Peter, did you or anyone you know steal the body
of Jesus Christ from the tomb of Joseph of Arimathea on the morning in
question? Or any time for that matter?
PETER: No.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Before that morning did you think you would ever
see Jesus again?
PETER: No. As a matter of fact, I was thinking real serious about
getting back into the fishing business. I had lost all hope of ever
seeing him again.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Why?
PETER: Because I had a hard heart and was slow to believe all that
the prophets had spoken.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: So, how do you explain what happened to the body
of Jesus Christ?
PETER: This Jesus hath God raised up, whereof we all are witnesses.
Therefore let all the house of Israel know assuredly, that God hath made
that same Jesus, whom ye have crucified, both Lord and Christ. Christ died
for our sins according to the scriptures; He was buried, and he rose again
the third day according to the scriptures:
DEFENDANT’S LAWYER: Could you explain what you mean by witnesses?
Was it one or two? Or was it just you the apostles?
PETER: He was seen by me, then of the twelve: After that, he was seen
of above five hundred brethren at once; And then, he was seen of James;
then of all the apostles and others besides that.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: That's all. I have no further questions.
JUDGE: Plaintiff's counsel, do you have have any cross-examination
of this witness?
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Yes your honor. Peter, how would you describe your
relationship with this Jesus of Nazareth?
PETER: Be it known unto you, Chief Priests and Elders, and to all people,
This Jesus is the stone which was set at nought of you builders, which
is become the head of the corner. Neither is there salvation in any other:
for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must
be saved.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: I marvel at your boldness Peter. For a fisherman
you speak as one who is learned.
But, I’ll take that to mean that you two were very close. At
the time of Jesus’ death you must have been very grieved. In distress
even. Good men have been known to steal in the midst of stressful
and trying circumstances have they not?
PETER: Whether it be right in the sight of God to hearken unto you
more than unto God, judge ye. For I cannot but speak the things which
I have seen and heard.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: I have no further questions your honor.
JUDGE: Next witness, please.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: I call Mary Magdalene.
COURT REPORTER: (to the witness) Raise your right hand. Do you solemnly
swear that the testimony you are about to give is the truth, the whole
truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God?
MARY: I do.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: State your name and where you’re from.
MARY: Mary Magdalene. I am from Magdala, a town on the western shore
of the Lake of Tiberias.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Do you know these eleven men?
MARY: Yes.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Are they thieves? Or, have you ever known
them to take anything that doesn’t belong to them?
MARY: No. Never! They are upright and honest men.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Could you describe for the court, what happened
when you got to the tomb where Jesus Christ’s body was laid?
MARY: Yes. In the end of the sabbath, as it began to dawn toward the
first day of the week, Mary and myself were on our way to see the sepulchre.
We were within sight of it when a great earthquake shook the ground: and
an angel of the Lord came and rolled back the stone from the door, and
sat upon it. His countenance was like lightning, and his raiment
white as snow: It was the most brilliant thing that I have ever seen.
And for fear of him the Roman soldiers did shake, and appeared to be dead.
The angel said: Fear not: for I know that you are looking for
Jesus, which was crucified. He is not here: for he is risen, as he said.
Come, see the place where the Lord lay. And go quickly, and tell his disciples
that he is risen from the dead; and, behold, he goeth before you into Galilee;
there shall ye see him: lo, I have told you.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: So did you go and tell the disciples?
MARY: Yes I did!
DEFENDANTS LAWYER: Did they believe you?
MARY: At first they did not believe me, my words seemed to them as
an idle tale. But, Peter and John made haste and ran to the tomb
to see it for themselves. Later on Jesus appeared unto them, he spoke
to them and ate with them, then they believed.
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: No further questions.
JUDGE: Plaintiff's counsel, do you have have any cross-examination
of this witness?
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: Miss Magdalene you seem to have a special relationship
with the deceased. You followed Jesus from Galilee ministering unto
him, you were at the sepulchre when Joseph rolled the stone over the door,
you traveled very early in the morning to the tomb. Why this special
relationship?
MARY: Jesus healed me from evil spirits!
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: For this you must be very grateful. You would
probably do anything in your power for this Jesus of Nazareth, wouldn’t
you?
MARY: Why yes of course I would. Jesus saved my life.
PLAINTIFF’S LAWYER: No further questions.
JUDGE: You may be dismissed. Any further witnesses?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: No, your honor. I rest my case.
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: No, your honor. I rest my case.
JUDGE: Plaintiff's counsel, would you care to make a closing argument
to the jury?
PLAINTIFF'S LAWYER: Your honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the
evidence you have heard proves that these eleven men did indeed steal the
body of Jesus Christ. Using the cover of darkness to accomplish there
dastardly deed, and sneaking past the Roman guard, took the body of Jesus
to some undisclosed location. The evidence shows that when Mary Magdalene
and Mary the mother of James came upon the tomb, that it was empty.
The deed had already been done. Mr. Joseph of Arimathea an accomplice
in this conspiracy had ample time with the body to plant weapons or other
devices to overpower the Guards if need be. It couldn’t be more clear about
what has taken place here, now could it? You must come to the right decision
so that this fable does not spread any further among the people.
I ask you to do the right thing and bring back a verdict in favor of the
Chief Priests and Elders and against these eleven apostles.
JUDGE: Defense counsel, do you wish to address the jury?
DEFENDANT'S LAWYER: Yes, your honor. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
these eleven apostles are innocent of the charges filed against them. Do
you think they could take on a group of hardened Roman soldiers?
And how do you account for the linen clothes folded and neatly laid in
the tomb? Surely a group of thieves stealing the body of Jesus wouldn’t
take the time to fold grave clothes. And how do you explain the multitude
of witnesses that saw Jesus afterwards? Why is it the Roman soldiers
were not put to death for failing to keep their post and falling asleep
on the job? And if this elite Roman Guard was asleep, how did they
know that the body was stolen? If we are to conclude that the Apostles
or anyone else for that matter stole the body of Jesus. Then we must
also conclude that reason, logic and the facts have no part in our
decision making process. I ask you to do the right thing today and bring
back a verdict in favor of these eleven apostles. A decision against evil
and the forces of darkness of which these chief priests and elders represent.
JUDGE: Jurors, you will now take as much time as needed to deliberate.
You have chosen a Mr. Ellis Seaman as the jury leader. When you have reached
a verdict, please let the Bailiff know. Bailiff, please take charge of
the jury.
JURY: (Motions to Bailiff and whispers to him)
BAILIFF: Your honor the Jury has reached a verdict.
JUDGE: Very well. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury what is your
verdict?
JURY: The jury has determined by unanimous decision that this Jesus,
has God raised up on the third day, and was shown openly; Not to
all the people, but unto witnesses chosen before of God. And through
the testimonies that have been given. That, it is he, which was ordained
of God to be the Judge of quick and dead.
And to him give all the prophets witness, that through his name whosoever
believeth in him shall receive remission of sins. Therefore it is
our decision that these eleven defendants are not guilty of the charges
brought against them.
JUDGE: Ruling in favor of the defendants. Case dismissed!
(pound gavel)
………………………………..
Copyright John Porter, all rights reserved.
This script may be used without royalty payment, provided no charge is made for
entrance to the performance. In return, the author would like to be told of any
performance. He may be contacted at seda625@yahoo.com