Mother: (on microphone, very irritated) What???!!!!
Daughter #1: Mom, are you in there?
Mother: Yes, I'm in here!!
Daughter #1: (speaking to the door) I need to get in...I've got to get ready to go to the mall. Remember you promised to drive me there...
Mother: (loudly and irritated) I'm not coming out! All you people want is for me to do something for you, and...and...I'm on strike!
Daughter #1: (backs up from the door) Mom, that's not fair!
Mother: I'm not coming out!
(daughter #2 enters stage and approaches daughter #1)
D2: Marcy, who's in the bathroom?
D1: Mom...and she says she's not coming out!
D2: She's not coming out? WHY?
D1: (Looks at D2 disgustedly) How should I know? She said something about being on strike...
Mother: That's right...I'm on strike!
D2: (To D1) How long do you think she's going to be in there?
Mother: As long as I like!
(D2 motions for D1 to walk with her offstage)
D1: Boy, mom's really gone off the deep end this time!
(Husband enters carrying brief case and knocks on the wall)
H: Deb, when is dinner going to be ready?
M: I don't know...it depends on when you start fixing it.
H: (backs away from the door; holds his hands out in front of him like a Ïstick-upÓ) Ouch!...Honey, are you okay? The girls said something about you being on strike...
M: I am. I'm staying in this bathroom until I get a better ÏcontractÓ.
H: (puts his ear to the door) A what?
M: Contract!! Everybody in this house thinks I'm some kind of slave that gets to do all the stuff no one else wants to do. I refuse to come out until this changes for real!!
H: Honey, why don't you come out and let's talk about it.....over dinner.
M: No way. I know what that means....I cook dinner and nothing ends up changed. No way. I'm not coming out until I get a better deal.
H: (walks away shaking his head) Now what am I going to do about supper...I guess I could order a pizza...
(2 daughters and husband reenter stage and knock on door; D1 has pizza box but does not show it)
H: Deb...Deb, are you still in there?
M: I'm still in here!
H: The girls and I have talked and we have written a ÏcontractÓ for you to look at. I'm slipping it under the door (pretends to slide paper under the door).
(pause; hear paper rustle; H and Ds lean close to the door)
M: (reading contract out loud) Dear Wife and Mother...We hereby pledge and promise to cease and desist...this must have been dad's contribution (dad smiles broadly at audience as he hears this)...from asking you to do things we can do ourselves. We promise to equally share the bathroom...I know that this was a real stretch for you girls...and to do our part to keep the house straight. We also promise to share the responsibility for preparing meals and cleaning up the kitchen. Finally, we will get dad to take us places we need to go at least half of the time.
H: (surprised at girls) Wait a minute...I didn't know that was in there!!
M: I added that one. Just consider it my adjustment to the contract!
D2: Well, mom,....will you come out?
M: Well, okay. I guess this will do for now.
(the 3 step back from the door as mom comes out, all 4 hug)
D1: Mom, we decided to fix supper tonite and clean up, just so you know we are serious. So here's supper (hands a pizza box to her)
M: (looking at audience) Oh, well. Some things never change!
(all walk off stage together)
............................................................................
© Fred Lane, Crosswind Community Church, All rights reserved
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies
are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged. In
exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified
of when and for what purpose the play is performed. He may be contacted
at: advpastor@gmail.com