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Summary: A lonely man (or woman) questions his life and God.
Style: Heavy          Duration: 5min
Actors: 1M/F

 

 

Characters:
Man (with minor changes this monologue would work equally well for a Woman)

Editor's note: I suggest this monologue be used with a follow-up of some sort, such as a sermon, teaching or group discussion. It raises a number of serious issues that we, the Body of Christ, must be aware of and address. The monologue can be aimed at teens using an older teen, or older using an older actor. The monologue can be shortened for purposes of time or difficulty memorizing.

Script:

(Man or Woman goes center stage- movements and how lines are delivered are left to the discretion of the actor)

You may not remember me, but I remember you. I remember everybody from school. You could point to anyone in this book I have, and I could tell you their name. It took me a while to memorize them all but I got around to it. I bet you're wondering where'd you get all the time to do this? Why did you take all the time to memorize this stupid book? This stupid book with all these stupid people. I'll tell you why, it's because I've got nothing better to do.

Well, in any case, if you don't remember me, you remember her. You know who I'm talking about. That perfect girl who you always crossed paths with. I ran into that girl all the time. Whether she was some popular prototype or just plain sweet...she was always there. Always. Even now I can still see that girl roaming the halls, laughing with her friends. She's still there. But there was always something terrible about that girl. She was always with some other guy. Some other guy who was fast enough, smart enough, and better looking enough to hold hands with that girl. Luck guy...every time I saw them hold hands, it just broke me. It broke me right down to my core. Especially when they were going down a hall and they turned a corner. It always made me wonder, you know, where she was going. Whether going to the prom, or getting married, I knew she was going with him.

I felt especially bad for the popular girl. Whenever she walked away I knew her future was uncertain. I could always hear whispers about her. She always got sucked into something awful, something that would ruin her. I don't know what happened to her but I still worry for her. It's pathetic but it's true. Wherever she is, I hope she's smiling that same smile. The one smile she had when she was with all her friends.

That's probably what I envy most. The smiles everyone had when they were with all their friends. All these people had all these wonderful memories, and I wasn't in a single one of them. No one even remembers my name. In life, everyone's the main character, but me. I'm a background character. I'm just someone passing by. I would ask God why, why have you done this to me? What have I done to be cursed with such loneliness? Day and night I prayed to find the answer, but I never did. I was so mad at God for never telling me why. If he was going to give me this miserable life, the least He could do is tell me WHY.

It never stopped hurting. It hurt so much. And it still hurts. You all moved on with your lives...I didn't do any of that. It's still just me. It's always just me. I'm not even a living person anymore. The only life I have left in me is when I go to sleep at night. I say my prayers and then I dream. When I'm dreaming, that's when I feel better. There's a girl I love and she loves me and all these people want to be my friends. It gives me a certain warmth, a certain false hope. But of course the morning comes back, and I wake up and it's just me. It feels like someone just snatched your soul away. It's a horrible feeling.

But I'm glad someone out there is happy. I'm glad someone out there got to feel what it was like to love someone and have them love you back. Whoever you may be, never let it go. You don't know what it's like over here. It's horrible, I hate it. But out of all of that stuff, none of it's the worst. The worst part is I have to accept it. I have to take it with open arms. I have no choice in the matter, I just do it. No matter what age you are, it's still hard to get used to. Being the person no one wanted, I just lock it all away. NOT because I want to, but because I have to.

I'd just be another big fat mess to the rest of you. An inconvenience. Something in the way. Something you just want to plow through. I do it for you. I've come to terms with it for YOU. I wouldn't want to rupture something so happy. I wouldn't want to ruin this perfect happiness you have. I want you to keep it. I want you to hold onto it. I want you to love it. I know now that God assigns a certain role to everybody, and this is mine. So there. I remember you and I keep it together for you. For everyone just like you. You may not have accepted me, but whatever I am, whatever this is, it accepts me at least. And I accept it.

But God......why?

 

© Copyright Linus Scope, all rights reserved. The script may not be reproduced, translated or copied in any medium, including books, CDs and on the Internet, without written permission of the author.
This play may be performed free of charge, on the condition that copies are not sold for profit in any medium, nor any entrance fee charged. In exchange for free performance, the author would appreciate being notified of when and for what purpose the play is performed. He/she may be contacted at:
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